Motivational speaker: 5 STEP TO BECOMING A SUPERWOMAN

Some women think that being a super woman is all about appearing on the cover of Vogue Magazine, having Oprah on speed dial and playing social tennis with Serena Williams. While it may be true that some celebrities are super women, being a super woman has nothing to do with being a super star. In fact, most super women are virtually unknown to the world because being a super woman is all about being special to the people that matter to you – your spouse, your children, your family, your friends and your community.

So how does one become a super woman? What do you need to do in order to make a difference in the lives of the people that matter to you? Indeed, how would you even know that you are really touching the lives of the people that matter to you?

The following steps, however, will go along way in helping you know, for sure, that your actions are making a difference in the lives of the people you love.

Step 1: Define Who Matters to You

The first step to becoming a super woman is to identify the people that matter to you. This step may seem unnecessary for most people because we already know whom we care for. However, making a list of those people is very important for the other steps that follow.

Additionally, you will be surprised to discover how little attention you have been giving to some of the people you otherwise, consider important to you. Knowing who is important to you is one thing but taking actions that will show your love for them is another. Sometimes we even tend to forget the people that are closest to us by taking them for granted. This is common especially amongst couples that have stayed together for a long time.

As far as the list goes, most people start with spouses and children and then move on to parents, grandparents, brothers and sisters before moving on further to the extended family of uncles, aunts and cousins. Going beyond the family, the list will normally include friends and the immediate community – the neighbourhood, the office or place of business, place of worship, social club and many others.

· Step 2: Decide How You Will Love Them

Having defined the circle of people who matter to you, you then have to define what you believe would be the best way to love them, to be of meaning to them. But how do you go about loving the people who matter to you? Or, simply put, how do you do love?

One trick that most people use to answer this question is to ask themselves what they would want to hear those people say about them after they are gone. In other words, if you had a chance to listen to people talk about you at your funeral, what would you like to hear them say about what you meant to them? What special things would you like your spouse to write in your obituary? What would you like your children to say at your funeral? In other words, what legacy do you want to leave behind?

Step 3: Get Organized

Having listed the things you would want them to remember you for, the next logical step would be to start doing those things. What you need to do is put together a plan and decide how you will put it into action. You need to get organized. Without a plan and a strategy, your good works will last but only a short while.

Getting organized is all about setting goals and following them. Goals will help you stay focused as well as keep track of progress. The simplest way of setting goals is to consider what you want to achieve at the end of everything, break it into smaller short-term goals, which you will achieve by doing small things on a daily or weekly, monthly or annual basis.

For instance, if, by the end of your life you would like the people who matter to you to remember you as a loving and caring person then that will become your main goal. In order to achieve this goal you will have to break it into smaller goals also known as objectives, which are the unique and different ways of being a loving and caring person to different people on your list.

But how do you achieve these objectives? How, for example, do you love and care for your ageing parents? You achieve your objectives, though activities. For example, you can meet your objective of being a loving and caring daughter for your aging parents by providing for their physical and psychological needs like staying with them or providing them with assisted living service and visiting them regularly. In other words, the activities will help you achieve your objectives, which, in turn, will lead you to your goal.

The goal of being a super woman is fulfilled by achieving the objectives of being a super wife, a super mum, a super daughter, a super providing unique acts of love and care to each person or group of people you hold dear to your heart.

Step 4: Do Love

Once you have clearly defined your goals, objectives and activities, your next task is concentrate on the activities and little else. If your map reading was correct and you have found the routes you need to follow to get where you want to go, all you have to do is concentrate on the driving. You can check the traffic signs, but you certainly do not have to be looking at your map every other minute to see if you are on the right route.

Compared to driving and map reading, this is the easiest step, particularly, for women. Women are naturally hardwired to be loving and caring. Women are always touching the lives of their spouses, and children, friends and even their communities on a daily basis.

A woman will help out a fellow woman struggling with her toddlers on the train; a woman will call and comfort a friend who is having a hard time with her boss at work; a woman will take a few moments to sit next to her 10 year old child who is having a tough time with a bully at school and tell him that he is better than the bully because all bullies are cowards. Women will do all these without having to think or plan for them. They just take them in stride. Men, on the other hand, can hardly take out the trash without, first, putting it on To-Do-List.

So, if women are super women by nature, then what is the point of this article, you will ask? The point is not to teach women how to be loving and caring. The point is simply to help them become more efficient and effective by making sure that their natural ability for loving and caring is targeted and planned. The purpose here is to help women put their loving and caring priorities in order. They should not look back and find out that, despite all their efforts, very little or nothing at all was done for some if not all the people that mattered most.

Step 5: Look after Number 1

You will be of no use to the people that matter to you if you are always sick and tired. If anything, instead of becoming a person they cherish, you will become a burden as everyone will start to worry about you. This can happen easily if you forget to look after yourself first.

The most precious asset you have in life is yourself. In order to achieve anything you need to be alive and well. It is therefore important to make sure that you are functioning well at all times by taking good care of your body, mind and soul.

Taking care of your body rests on three things: hygiene, diet and exercise. You need to maintain cleanliness of your body and your clothes at all times. You need to eat a balanced diet and the right amount. And you need to do regular exercises. If your hands are full, find time to take walks daily or every other day.

Similarly, you can keep you mind in good shape by making sure that it is getting enough exercise as well as rest. You exercise you mind by educating yourself about things that matter to you. The best way to do this is by reading books and magazines that appeal to you as well as attending seminars and courses. You rest your mind by having personal quiet time every day, taking days off on a regular basis and going on holiday, at least once a year.

Your soul is also a being that requires proper hygiene, feeding and exercises. Soul hygiene means keeping your soul away from things that are spiritually unpleasant like foul language and immoral behaviour. Exercising your soul is done through the acts of love and care which, fortunately, you will already be doing as a super woman.

Just like your body needs physical food every day, your soul also needs spiritual food on a daily basis. Find your God and connect with Him – whatever that God may be. Spend some time at the start of each day to have a one-on-one chat with your God. Spend part of that time to learn more about Him by reading His word from the Torah, the Bible, the Quran or whatever literature is used as a guide for your religion. Even if you do not believe in God, you still believe in something – yourself, mostly. Take time, then, to connect with your inner self and realign with your centre at the start of each day.

If you keep your body, mind and soul in good shape, not only will you avoid being a burden to the very people whose lives you are trying to touch but you will be successful in your quest to become a super woman.

Remember that being a super woman is about being cherished and appreciated by those you hold dear to your heart. As a woman, you are already designed to love and care for others. With just a little targeting and planning, the woman in you will soar to heights you have never dreamt and bring you peace beyond what money and fame can bring you: the peace that comes from knowing that someone is better off because of you.